


I Am Stronger Than Yesterday

by faithinthepoor



Series: Glee [18]
Category: Glee
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-14
Updated: 2014-07-14
Packaged: 2018-02-08 18:23:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1951449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faithinthepoor/pseuds/faithinthepoor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set during Britney/Brittany</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Am Stronger Than Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> In my series this follows [I’m Not That Girl](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640810), [It Sucks to be Me](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640836), [Kiss Me Goodbye](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640850), [We All Have Sorrow](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640862), [I’m Not Myself Lately](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640884), [I Ain’t the Worst You’ve Ever Seen](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640900), [I Know That I’ve Got Issues](http://archiveofourown.org/works/640908), [You’ll Never See What You’ve Done to Me](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641365), [Everyone Must Stand Alone](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641370), [I Should Be Happy](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641377), [Every Now and Then I Fall Apart](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641387), [I Wish That I Had Jesse’s Girl](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641391), [I Dreamed That God Would Be Forgiving](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641394), [I Don’t Want To Be Friends](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641401), [I’m a Loser Baby](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641414), [I Sometimes Wish I’d Never Been Born At All](http://archiveofourown.org/works/641422) and [I Don’t Wanna Think Anymore](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1951407)

During the confusion that, for months to come, coach Sylvester will refer to as a Britney sex riot she feels a yank on her arm pulling her out of the sea of adolescents. She has strange feeling of detachment and can’t help thinking that what she’s watching doesn’t really qualify as a sex riot. Neither term seems accurate. As far as she is aware one desperate girl yelling out about wanting to have Schue’s children hardly amounts to sex and the group running around the gymnasium seem to have more in common with headless chickens than a rioting mob. If this actually is a sex riot then she is surprisingly disappointed. 

Coach Sylvester’s animosity to Britney Spears makes no sense to Quinn. This is the same woman who insisted that Madonna be piped through the halls and uses that artist as an example of behaviour that the Cheerios should emulate. Not only has Madonna collaborated with Britney, and had a rather public kiss at the MTV awards, she released a video that was banned from TV and wrote a book entitled Sex. From Quinn’s perspective, when compared with Sue Sylvester’s role model, the girl who sang Born to Make You Happy seems quite benign. 

Quinn’s popcultural analysis ends when she realises that Rachel has managed to drag her out of one of the many exits that the other students have failed to notice. She finds herself standing outside the gym having some rather serious reservations about the nation’s future.

“We need to talk,” Rachel hisses.

“Nice place you’ve brought me to,” Quinn observes from her position between two dumpsters.

“I wanted to have this conversation in private.”

“Don’t you think that private conversations should be reserved for your boyfriend? Where is Finn by the way?”

“He is trying to help some of the less capable students find their way out in the panic.” Rachel says this like Finn is performing a heroic act but all Quinn can focus on is how hard it is going to be for Finn to find anyone less capable than him.

“So what did you want to talk about?”

“What’s up with you?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve been ignoring me.”

“Rachel I attempted to honey trap your boyfriend for you. A boyfriend who used to be my boyfriend I might add. I think that counts as paying far more attention to your demands than is required of me.”

“I know you did and I sorta of feel bad about asking you to do that.”

“Only sorta?” 

“Well,” Rachel looks toward the ground, “I really did want to know if he would throw me over for you.”

“So it was helpful that I acted like a backstabbing slut then?”

“Quinn, that’s not what you did.”

“It’s certainly what Finn will think that I did,” she points out.

“I was under the impression that you believed that Finn was incapable of independent thought.”

She almost smiles at that but she’ll be damned if she is going to let Rachel make her happy. “He might mention the scenario to someone else and they might tell him what was happening. If they use simple enough terminology he might even understand.”

“You shouldn’t talk about Finn like that. He’s a good guy.”

“Which is why I would prefer it if he doesn’t think of me as a bitch. I did what you wanted but you don’t get to ask me to feel happy about it.”

“You didn’t have to do it.”

In one sense what Rachel says is true but the problem is that Quinn was powerless to resist a request from her, “I know that. Look it’s done now and I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

“That’s fine. It’s not the thing I wanted to talk about anyway?”

“Oh?”

“I don’t really know how to say this,” Rachel’s feet have clearly become the most interesting thing on the planet as she is unable to look anywhere else.

“I guess it’s going to be a short conversation then,” Quinn states and moves to leave.

“Stop. I need to know why you didn’t look at me in the Britney outfit.”

“Are you serious?” she can’t believe that for a moment she thought this might have been about something important.

“Everyone else looked at me. Santana even approved of it and you might not have heard but there was even a bit of a scandal about it.”

“That little fuzzballed freak would break into you room to steal strands of your hair and skin cells in an attempt to create a Rachel Berry clone. I don’t think he gets to be the standard by which a commotion is measured when it relates to you.”

“I’m just trying to say that everyone reacted to my change in attire. Some of the reactions were more positive than others but you wouldn’t even look at me. I know that because I was watching you.”

“Why were you watching me?”

Rachel briefly looks up at her but then returns to the study of her feet, “I can’t help that.”

“Rachel you made your choice, you don’t get to watch me.”

“I miss you.”

“This is want you wanted.”

“It’s want I thought I wanted.”

“It doesn’t actually matter what you want because you don’t get a say in it anymore.”

“I know I’m with Finn but I still really need you to love me.”

“God Rachel does your ego know no bounds?”

“But that’s the thing. Sure I’m confident about my stage craft and my talent and I’ve never imagined that I wouldn’t be a star. It’s all my life has ever been about. It’s what I’ve worked for since it became clear that I have perfect pitch. The thing is, when I become a star, it won’t mean anything if I don’t have anyone in my life. I never thought I could have a Tony and still feel empty but when that day comes I don’t think it will mean anything if I don’t have someone to share it with.”

“You’ve got Finn, Rachel.”

“For how long?”

“That’s between you and Finn.”

“You know how everyone was going to the dentist and having some sort of vivid dreams?”

“I had noticed. It’s probably going to put a dent in your path towards stardom now that Brittany is going to get all of the solos.”

“I don’t really know what that was about but it does seem that everyone was having very positive anaesthesia related experiences.”

“I wouldn’t know,” she had her opportunity to be drugged into oblivion during labour but she wasn’t interested. The possibility of hallucinating a Britney song really isn’t sufficient reason to have herself rendered unconscious. Besides she’s worried that if she had a Britney moment it would be to ‘Lucky’ and she’s not prepared to face how apt that would be and she is certainly not going to be telling Rachel that she cries every night.

“I went to the dentist.”

“I didn’t think you’d need to stoop to performance enhancing drugs in order to steal your solos back from Brittany.”

“Yeah I have no idea what goes on in that girl’s mind but I didn’t go for that reason. I take dental hygiene very seriously. Tooth and gum problems can impact on your general health and that is not a risk I am willing to take.”

“It must have killed you that the dreamy dentist’s pill made your teeth look like a row of little smurfs,” the thought of Rachel’s blue teeth brings a genuine smile to Quinn’s lips.

“Hence why I had to go to the dentist but my dream experience wasn’t that great.”

“Was it something off the Blackout album?”

“No but it wasn’t about me feeling powerful and confident. It was about being frightened that Finn wants to leave me.”

“Rachel I swear you are going to have to find someone else to work through your Finn related insecurities with you because if you bring it up with me again I will slap you.”

“But I don’t have anyone else to talk to.”

“Then I suggest you find someone quickly.”

“But you know Finn better than most…” Rachel’s words end when Quinn’s hand makes contact with her face. “I can’t believe you did that.”

“I warned you. Rachel if this is what it’s going to be like I can’t be in your life.”

“But I need you.”

“Well you should have thought of that before you picked Finn.”

“Please Quinn I don’t have anyone else,” Rachel’s voice is so small that Quinn wants to hold her and tell her that everything will be alright but she simply can’t do that.

“Goodbye Rachel.”

As Quinn is walking away Rachel yells, “I hate you.”

She turns back to face Rachel and calmly states, “Don’t worry. I hate you more.”

Quinn’s not sure what she expected to happen but Rachel grabbing her by her vest and kissing her senseless was not on that list. None the less that is exactly what happened which is how she finds herself pressed up against a dumpster with her lips locked with Rachel’s. There is nothing romantic about either the situation or the kiss but the message is very clear. They need this. They need one another. 

When they finally break apart Rachel runs her hand down the side of Quinn’s face and says, “I really have to go.”

“Ok,” Quinn replies but despite her words she pulls Rachel back and this time Rachel is the one pressed against the dumpster while Quinn plunders her mouth.

Rachel allows the kiss to go on much longer than Quinn had anticipated and when it comes to a natural end she bites her lower lip and places her forehead against Quinn’s, “You wreck me.”

“Ditto.”

The next time Quinn sees Rachel the brunette is serenading Finn and making declarations of lasting and special love. A lesser person would be crushed by that but Quinn is sure that Rachel’s emotional performance is fuelled by guilt. Quinn has some serious doubts that Rachel is as committed to Finn as she claims. It seems as though this race is far from over and if it comes down to a competition between her and Finn, well then, game on.


End file.
